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Internet Brothers: Helpware for the Cybercommunity - Lucid Confusion
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Random Thoughts About  Life   Net  Stuff

March 25, 2000 - Why did God make man not truly appreciate the twenty something female form until he's twice that age? By then it's like Eve in the garden of forbidden fruit, in reverse. Is that His punishment for taking things for granted in our youth? At least He has a sense of humor. He plays this practical joke on us every Spring when the flowers, and fashions, bloom. Nuts.

March 23, 2000 - Happy Birthday Dad!

March 22, 2000 - I love getting email from newcomers. There was this fellow today, bless his heart, who was following along with my HTML tutorial, and creating his first ever web page. I suppose he was thinking ahead a bit, give him credit for that, and named the file on his PC http://www.webdesign.html. His question today was about the 11001 Host not found error he was receiving.

March 21, 2000 - In the American South, it is quite common for guys to display baseball caps in the back window of their cars. Maybe it's their favorite Nascar driver or sports team, perhaps their union logo or just something they picked up along the way. Today while strolling around, I discovered a new phenomenon. Placed in prominent view, as if mounted for display, was a pair of lace women's underwear. So tell me girls, is this the latest way of poking fun at your brethren, or was it just some redneck jerk advertising his latest prize?

March 20, 2000 - While the mass suicide in Uganda is certainly a human tragedy, I never have quite understood how self-immolation can be preferable to whatever apocalyptic event the zealots were expecting. I'm no expert on Revelations, but setting a building on fire with more than 300 occupants sure seems like Hell to me. Alma Geddon puts a good spin on all this.

March 18, 2000 - A very kind person helped me with a decision today — whether to get personal and soulful, or formal and traditional. I chose the former and like it better. We'll see how it turns out, which reminds me. When opossums are playing opossum, they are not "playing." They actually pass out from sheer terror.

March 17, 2000 - As much as I like and admire the Open Directory Project, I despise and detest Go Network's Go Guides. Amateurish by comparison, there seems to be no rhyme or reason to getting listed and achieving ratings. No consistency. Some of the absolute best sites on the Web can't even get a listing, while garbage even worse than my own garners three stars. Go fish.

March 16, 2000 - I have to admit, I've only rarely visited Slashdot, primarily because of just a passing interest in Linux. I get enough Unix at my day job. So when I read Rob Malda's diary of the Andover.net IPO "quiet period", I was surprised. I like this guy. Energetic, hard working, chock full of angst, most of all, doing what he wants to do and enjoying it. Rob, this Dew's for you.

March 15, 2000 - Today I celebrate seven years of continuous sobriety. Instead of looking in the mirror at scrapes and bruises, red and yellow eyes, and a hollow soul; I see hope, gratitude and a reason for enjoying life. I used to have a sign on that mirror that said, "You're looking at the problem." Now it says, "You're looking at the solution." Cheers to me.

Did you hear the one about the guy who walks into a bar, and says "Ouch!" Why do AlAnon members make love with their eyes closed? Because they can't stand to see an A.A. having fun. Drink or think. Don't drink and think.

March 14, 2000 - These two weddings this year are going to be the death of me. At least our son's is already behind us. They say it is a woman's prerogative to change her mind, but between my wife and her daughter, I don't know if I'm coming or going. Will it be in West Virginia, or Ohio, or Las Vegas? Looks like wedding in Vegas, reception three weeks later in WV. At least that's this week. Stay tuned. Wonder if my boss would send me on a six month assignment to Kuwait or somewhere?

March 13, 2000 - My wife didn't buy the excuse that they should have known better. So outside we traipsed with plastic and bricks and flashlights in our pajamas. Don't those stupid Easter lilies and dogwoods and such know last week's faux Spring was just a temptation? Show yourself. Then I'll frost all over you, ha-ha. Knowing my wife, we'll probably be doing this every night for the next two weeks. Got to keep thinking the good thoughts though, 'cause love is grand, divorce is a hundred grand.

March 11, 2000 - I don't condone criminal activity of any kind, but you've got to give these guys some credit. Like something you'd see in a movie. I'm sitting here staring at my chihuahua trying to figure out why she's licking the handkerchief I just blew my nose in. Anyway, glad I don't have any EDS stock.

March 10, 2000 - I've been pondering the motivations of the email spammer. For some, it must take at least as much time out of their day as productive development. There's this one particularly annoying intrusion. As soon as I open it, my browser launches. Pretty intricate coding to do that, but time better spent elsewhere, one would think. So I add them to my blocked senders list, then two hours later, here comes the same thing from a different email address. I realize they're just spoofing origins, but again, that takes time and effort. So Mr. Spammer, you tell me, is the payback from all this really worth it? There are thousands of companies willing to pay good money for your skills.

March 9, 2000 - You wake up one day, realize you're older than your dad was when you were in college, experienced enough in your recovery from alcoholism to understand the importance of the 12th step, facing the twilight years of your corporate Information Technology career, and you are bored. You sit in a cubicle smaller than your bedroom closet, fun is when projects are assigned to someone else, and the biggest loss from a system crash is that you lose your best jokes.

Applied for my own job again today. Third time in seven years. Last August my company got bought in another of those mega-billion dollar mergers and acquisitions so popular among the Fortune(ate) 500. Federal Trade Commission and European Union will rule on it in May. The new owners wanted our resumes by March 15th. I'm pretty good at this by now, but it doesn't make it any less distracting. Did you know the launching mechanism of an aircraft carrier that helps jet fighters take off can throw a pickup truck over a mile? Hmmm.

March 8, 2000 - I don't know about you, but I have a soft spot in my heart for friendly people. Here's one. Candi is the head red at the Realm of Redheads. Speaking of red, have you seen what the latest cyber scam artists are up to?

March 7, 2000 - Whatever happened to the spirit of free enterprise and ingenuity in the United States? The Girl Scouts of America has made the practice of selling their cookies over the WWW against policy. As a result, one troop in Hudson, N.H. had to call off their "Cookie Time" even before it officially starts on March 11th. Someone's missing the boat here; perhaps it's me.

March 5, 2000 - With the recent furor over web patents, particularly related to Amazon.com's one-click shopping, don't you think some search engine's hawking of book and auction sites is a bit much? To see what I mean, go to LookSmart and do a search on "nuclear weapons" or "my leg"; sponsors, sheesh.

Do you have lucid confusion? Tell us about it on our comments page. Proceed to the next page for more lucid confusion.


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